Articles &
Resources
Articles on men's mental health, recovery, relationships, and the work of becoming who you want to be.
Anticipatory Grief: Mourning Before the Loss
Anticipatory grief is real grief, not a rehearsal. What it means to mourn someone who is still here, the guilt that comes with it, and how therapy helps when the loss has not happened yet.
What Trauma Actually Does to Your Brain
Trauma is not what happened to you. It is what happened inside you as a result. Here is what the nervous system does with overwhelming experience, and how therapy helps the brain heal.
Grief Is Not Something You Get Over
People are told to find closure, move on, get back to normal. None of that reflects how grief actually works. Here is what does.
ADHD Is Not a Focus Problem
The name itself is misleading. ADHD is not about a deficit of attention. It is about the inability to regulate attention, emotion, and executive function.
Sex & Porn Addiction in the Church: Saved But Still Struggling
Faith doesn’t automatically remove compulsive behaviour. For men caught on the shame treadmill of sin, repentance, and relapse, here’s why the church alone isn’t enough — and how therapy and faith can work together.
Why Accountability Software Isn’t the Cure
Yes, you can bypass the filters. That’s not the point. Accountability software creates friction and signals a desire to change — but the real work is rewiring the brain underneath the behaviour.
Why You Feel Nothing (And What That’s Really About)
Emotional numbness isn’t the absence of feelings. It’s your brain’s way of protecting you from overwhelm. Here’s what’s really going on and how therapy can help you reconnect.
What to Expect in Your First Session with a CSAT
Walking into a therapist’s office for the first time is hard enough. Walking in to talk about sexual behaviour? That takes real courage. Here’s what actually happens.
How CSAT Training Changed How I Practice
Before CSAT training, I thought I understood addiction. I didn’t. Here’s what changed in how I work with men struggling with compulsive sexual behaviour.
The Difference Between Sex Addiction and a High Sex Drive
Frequency isn’t the issue. Loss of control, escalation, and continuing despite consequences — that’s where the line is. Here’s how to tell the difference.
Do I Need a CSAT, or Can Any Therapist Help?
A good therapist can help with a lot. But sex addiction has specific dynamics that require specialized training. Here’s when a CSAT makes the difference.
What the Research Says About Sex Addiction Recovery
The science behind compulsive sexual behaviour, why structured treatment works, and what the evidence tells us about lasting recovery.
Doom Scrolling: Why You Can’t Stop (And What to Do About It)
Your brain treats social media like a slot machine. Here’s the neuroscience behind doom scrolling, what you’re actually avoiding, and how to break the loop.
Your Phone Is Not the Problem. You’re Not the Problem Either.
Two narratives keep you stuck: “just put it down” and “I’m broken.” Neither is true. The real question is what you’re looking for when you pick up your phone.
Dopamine and Your Brain: What Social Media Is Actually Doing
Dopamine isn’t the pleasure chemical — it’s the wanting chemical. Here’s how social media exploits your brain’s reward system and what you can do about it.
Understanding Depression: More Than Just Feeling Sad
Depression is not just sadness. It affects your thinking, energy, sleep, and relationships. Learn the signs, understand the difference between sadness and clinical depression, and take a free self-assessment.
Understanding Anxiety: When Worry Becomes Overwhelming
Everyone worries, but anxiety disorders are persistent, excessive, and interfere with daily life. Learn to recognize the signs and take a free anxiety self-assessment.
ADHD in Adults: What It Looks Like Beyond Childhood
ADHD does not just affect children. Many adults are undiagnosed or were never assessed. Here is what adult ADHD actually looks like and how therapy can help.
Burnout Is Not a Badge of Honour
For men who equate worth with productivity, burnout feels like proof you've been working hard enough. It isn't. Here's what burnout really is and how to recover.
Sleep Hygiene: What Every Parent Should Know
Sleep shapes how your child's brain develops, how they regulate emotions, and how they show up at school. Here's what parents can do to support healthy sleep habits at home.
The Difference Between Confidence and Self-Worth
Confidence is external and situation-dependent. Self-worth is internal and steady. Here's why knowing the difference changes everything.
Depression in Men: What It Actually Looks Like
Male depression often looks nothing like the stereotype. Irritability, withdrawal, numbness, risk-taking. Here's how depression actually shows up in men.
When Anxiety Runs the Show
Living with anxiety means your decisions, relationships, and daily life are shaped by fear. Here's how therapy changes that.
Why Sleep Is the Foundation of Mental Health
Sleep deprivation fuels anxiety, irritability, and poor decision-making. Why sleep is the most overlooked piece of men's mental health, and what to do about it.
Why Anger Isn't the Problem
Anger is a signal, not the issue itself. What's really going on underneath the outbursts, the silence, and the tension, and why addressing anger alone rarely works.
Your Body Is Keeping Score (And It's Tired)
How chronic stress lives in the body. The headaches, the tension, the exhaustion that won't go away. Why your body is trying to tell you something.
Understanding Compulsive Sexual Behaviour: It's Not About Willpower
If willpower alone could fix compulsive sexual behaviour, it would have worked by now. Here's what's really going on and what actually helps.
What Is Your Son Doing in the Bathroom With His Phone?
A guide for parents on recognizing signs of problematic phone use in teen boys, having the conversation without shame, and knowing when to get professional help.
What Your Teen Son Wishes You Knew
Behind the closed door and the one word answers, your son is carrying more than you think. A therapist's perspective on what teen boys actually need.
What Actually Happens in a Men's Recovery Group
It's not a circle of chairs and forced confessions. A CSAT led recovery group is structured, focused, and built for real accountability. Here's what it looks like from the inside.
When Trust Breaks: Couples Recovery After Sexual Addiction
Discovery day changes everything. But it doesn't have to be the end of your relationship. What couples need to know about rebuilding after betrayal trauma.
Adverse Childhood Experiences: What You Carry Without Knowing
Most people who experienced ACEs don't walk around thinking of themselves as trauma survivors. They just notice that certain things feel harder than they should.
Shame Is Not the Truth About You
Shame tells you that you are the problem. That the worst version of yourself is the real one. But shame is a liar, and learning to hear the difference changes everything.
Toxic Shame vs. Healthy Guilt: Why the Difference Matters
Guilt says I did something wrong. Shame says I am something wrong. One moves you forward. The other keeps you stuck. Here's how to tell them apart.
Limbic Capitalism: How Your Brain Became a Product
Your brain's reward system didn't evolve for the modern world. Limbic capitalism is the term for what happens when entire industries figure out how to exploit it. Here's why that matters for recovery.
The Shame and Addiction Cycle: How to Break Free
Shame doesn't prevent relapse. It fuels it. Understanding the shame cycle is the first real step toward lasting recovery.
How Shame Shows Up in Your Relationships
You withdraw. You get defensive. You overperform to earn love. Shame shapes the way we connect with the people closest to us, and most of us don't even realize it.
7 Books on Shame That Will Change How You See Yourself
The right book at the right time can crack something open. These are the books I recommend to clients working through shame, addiction, and self-worth.
Therapeutic Disclosure: What Couples Need to Know Before the Truth Comes Out
A structured, facilitated process for telling the full truth. What it involves, how to prepare, differing clinical perspectives, and why it should never be done alone.
The Impact Letter: Giving the Betrayed Partner a Voice
After disclosure, the betrayed partner finally gets to speak. The impact letter is how they tell the addicted partner what the betrayal actually cost them.
The Restitution Letter: What Accountability Actually Looks Like
Apologies wear thin. The restitution letter is where the addicted partner demonstrates they have actually heard the impact and outlines concrete commitments to change.
Staggered Disclosure: Why Telling the Truth in Pieces Does More Damage
Each new revelation resets the trauma clock. Staggered disclosure doesn't protect your partner. It keeps both of you stuck. There is a better way.
Spiritual Bypassing: When Faith Becomes Avoidance
Prayer, scripture, and community are powerful. But when they become a way to avoid difficult emotions instead of face them, something important gets lost.
Healing from Spiritual Abuse: When Faith Was Used to Control You
Faith is meant to bring life. But when spiritual authority is used to manipulate or silence, the wounds cut deep. Healing starts with separating the harm from the truth.
The Feelings Wheel (Yes, Really)
It looks corny. I know. But the Feelings Wheel is one of the most useful tools in therapy, especially for men who were never taught how to name what they're feeling.
Locus of Control: Why Taking Your Life Back Starts Here
If life feels like it's happening to you rather than through you, your locus of control may have shifted outward. Here's how to bring it back.
Becoming the Man You Want to Be: Therapy and Your Future Self
The gap between who you are today and who you want to become is where therapy does its best work. You already know the man you're capable of being.
Attachment Styles and Why Your Relationships Feel Hard
You shut down. You pull away. You overfunction. Your attachment style is running the show, and understanding it changes everything.
Trauma and the 12 Steps: Why Recovery Needs Both
The traditional 12-step model has helped millions. But it wasn't designed to address trauma. For many men, that's the missing piece.
Why Group Therapy Works When Individual Therapy Isn't Enough
Individual therapy is essential. But for men in recovery, it has limits. Group breaks open what one-on-one can't reach.
The Change Triangle: Understanding What You're Really Feeling
Most men are stuck in defenses without realizing it. The Change Triangle is a framework that maps exactly what's happening underneath.
We're Hiring a Registered Psychotherapist (RP or Qualifying)
Addy Psychotherapy is growing. We're looking for a relational, trauma-informed therapist to join our practice in Etobicoke, Toronto.
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